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| Sometimes to find the light, you have to be brave enough to wander into the darkness. Embrace the unknown! © Chosa Mweemba of Fiahlink Photography |
I have been thinking a lot recently about much of what I have posted this year and realised that I am in another transitional phase in my life. I am continuing to evolve into the human I am on this earth to be, and with that comes times of change. The happier I become with being the Zed Afropolitan woman my life experience has created, the more I have had to adjust my idea of how to allow that to manifest freely in a way that not only honours me, but has me being a useful member of the communities I chose to identify with. Part of the way I like to do that is through social media in various ways.
I have to the conclusion, four years after starting this blog, that I have said all I have to say for the moment. One thing I hate is to repeat myself. In order to say something new, I need to take a step back, process my experiences and my words to then move forward from there. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting the same results really is madness. Why keep banging your head on a door that refuses to open, when you could discover a new door for which you find you have the key to open?
I love to communicate, I believe it is what we as humans were designed to do. It is our greatest gift. It is the key to our greatest advancements. I have absorbed a lot of other people's communication: their points of view and their speech though their modi operandi in the last few years, most notably the diverse range of people I have been fortunate to meet after repatriating to Zambia. I could have done without some of what has come my way, but ultimately letting in the good and the bad has been positive. It has inspired a new approach to fulfilling my dreams personally and professionally. It has allowed me to understand my country and its people, and to appreciate what the continent means to me a lot better. It has led me to the profound in silence as this is the best way to articulate what I have experienced for the time being. I have said all I need to say with words through this blog until I have something new and pertinent to say. I am not driven by the fear to post to keep my blog current or to stay relevant in any way. I write for the love of expressing myself and the way that it has allowed me to experience life. I feel the best way for me to communicate is through the power of saying nothing at all, and letting the words that I have already released into the universe marinate. Who I am and what I stand for lives on forever thanks to the power of the internet. Anyone can discover something new through what I have proudly created here. And when I am overwhelmed by the need to use this channel to say something then I will, whenever that may be, sporadically or regularly in the future.
I created this blog four years ago just before the World Cup in South Africa, wrapped up in the fever and pride of the continent hosting the world's favourite game. It helped me to find a way to shape the four years I have lived mainly in Zambia. This year's World Cup once again has inspired me. With all the trouble Brazil has had reconciling hosting with the money spent and how it could have better benefitted its people, seeing teams so desperate to win like Honduras who played their opener against France like hooligans and my favourite infraction so far, Portugal's Pepe head butting Germany's Mueller after pulling him down, I realised that doing anything to make something happen is not always wise. Sometimes you have to take a step back, or tear down and rebuild. And sometimes it's just not your time, like Ghana showed with their unexpected loss to the USA. Yes they may still be able to make it through the group stage but sometimes you need to be realistic. The best kind of optimism is not forcing something to happen now, but knowing when to step back in order to make it happen later. I have no idea what the World Cup has in store over the next three weeks. With surprises continuously the teams participating continue to produce and with the beauty and riches in goals such as Van Persie's magnificent header that contributed to the Dutch beating Spain 5-1, I am happy to experience the uncertainty that will ultimately produce a winner.
So just as the stadiums in Brazil provide an arena for the globe's dreams to be realised through the beautiful game, I am creating the space for new possibilities to do the things I want to do on the continent and in the world through silence. And I am enjoying the uncertainty that comes with starting over.
Till my words have purpose and meaning again, I am finding peace in the profound power of silence...;} xo
